where am i going?
i don't know
All i know is that i've to start
somewhere
...

Ryoma Karupin

>> Thursday, July 30, 2009

Ryoma tries out White Line at home and Karupin joins in!
voices by me
fan sub translation not done by me

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interesting

it's that time of the month, a hot day and suddenly prune juice tastes like..thick liquid chocolate = MMMMMMM

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Paps saved my pc!!!

>> Wednesday, July 29, 2009

i will never use the phone for granted
i will never use the phone for granted
i will never use the phone for granted
.
.
.

XD!!! thanks to Paps my pc's saved and i listened to his advice on browsers. It's amazing the browser that i loathe has become the one i go by with.

only they have a good video converter add-on..heheh..

spoke to Nat about a current situation..thanks Nat..now to talk to Kak..XD

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sigh...

>> Tuesday, July 28, 2009

and i thought my pc was really infected...i remembered i was not supposed to download anything. And when i clicked "Enable Protection" it downloaded. Freaked out, i cancelled it.

sadly - or fortunately for some - i'm using a different browser now..

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distraction: PoT yaoi

>> Monday, July 27, 2009

told myself not to do this cos..there's too much more to study..

a short one then, it's been a long time since i've did T x F

i sp-i with my littl' i - warning yaoi
Fuji's letter to Tezuka

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Hoax : M1, Singtel and Starhub marked 60 billion sms celebration - $49 free mobile billing

i received the abovementioned sms and there wasn't any official announcement by the companies so i called up one of them and was informed that it is a hoax.

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ABEL!!!!!! JOHNIIIIIII, CHERI!!!!!!! :(

>> Saturday, July 25, 2009

i've asked two major bookstores and they can't get Tokyopop's Trinity Blood Rage Against The Moons 4 : Judgement Day...SONNNNNAAAAAAA!!!!!!

and they duno when Vassalord 3 comes..or whether they can get it..AAAARGH!!!!

THAT'S THE *#@! REASON WHY I HATE NOT UNDERSTANDING JAPANESE!!!!

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catcus help? and..

>> Friday, July 24, 2009

Thank you Marilyn The Catcus for your comment ~squeal~ X3 to thank you..

if anyone or anyone who knows anyone for catcus care please drop by Marilyn The Catcus blog as her catcus is in trouble. She has surfed much on the net but to no avail.

Reminds me of Fuji and his catcus by his window nya X3

and special thanks to mo hitori no boku, Marah, Muru, Terrence! for really taking the time off to listen..more than words

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rock roots deepened n movin'!

>> Thursday, July 23, 2009

Muru sure headbang for joy if he reads the above title XD

thanks to my bro i remember headbanging to Megadeth's Symphony of Destruction! Further surfing led to discoveries of the song's remixes aka "progression through the ages"...hey, and i thought Dream Theater's progressive! XD just a play on the word "progress".

lemme explain..Dream Theater's rock but specifically progressive rock. A bit of what progressive rock is

"Progressive rock bands pushed "rock's technical and compositional boundaries" by going beyond the standard rock or popular verse-chorus-based song structures. Additionally, the arrangements often incorporated elements drawn from classical, jazz, and world music.

Instrumentals were common, while songs with lyrics were sometimes conceptual, abstract, or based in fantasy.

Progressive rock bands sometimes used "concept albums that made unified statements, usually telling an epic story or tackling a grand overarching theme. (source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Progressive_rock)"

thus my above pun XD

big move for Dai Gor today..hope he's ok with his leg..i remembered moving for Martin XD and dashing for the sink to rinse my mouth after one gulp of non-alcoholic Beck's Beer, much to his friends' - and brother's xp - mirth...still can't believe they - of daily high alcohol consumption - could drink that! i take my hat off to them.. X)

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this i gotta upload!!!!

>> Tuesday, July 21, 2009

please read below entry for Caramelldansen...as for those who know...PRINCE OF TENNIS CARAMELLDANSEN!!! i can't stop laughing!!! Oshitari just looks so deadpan at Atobe. Then there's Sanada, Yukimura deadpan XD!!! Kenya i think, Oshitari's cousin. And Tezuka's background!!! XD and the three megane (not Megane's) INUI!!! then Tezuka joins in..XD i can't go on..*wiping tears off eyes laughing*

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Caramelldansen

Caramelldasen (Caramell Dance), released in 2001 by a Swedish music group Caramell, is also known as "Uma uma dance" in Japan. The song was mostly accompanied by fan-drawn anime characters dancing to its sped up version "Caramelldansen Speedycake Remix". In tribute to Sunday's Cosfest 2009 here's the original translation of the lyrics



And to top it off, here's how the anime characters dance...(OMG!!!! PRINCE OF TENNIS!!! TEZUKA, MAYONNAISE!!!!!! TUD - XD!!!!!! oooh there's Soubi and Ritsuka!)

(i had to edit some of the original notes to English) Anime series: Popotan, Naruto, Death Note, Suzumiya Haruhi no Yuuutsu, Tennis no Ojisama (Prince of Tennis), Code Geass, Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei, The Avatar, Crayon Shin-chan, Final Fantasy, Lucky Star, Higurashi no Naku Koro ni, Devil May Cry, Vocaloid, Dragon Ball Z, Meitantei Conan (Detective Conan), Zelda, Fruits basket, (Touhou IOSYS) Marisa Stole the Precious Thing x Lucky Star, Touhou IOSYS, Gintama, Rozen Maiden, Pirates of the Caribbean, Ouran High School Host Club, Ronald McDonald

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ah..Cosfest

>> Saturday, July 18, 2009

i miss Cosfest, really. It's been a week and that europhia - i would compare it to the sensation of having a nice time in a swimming pool but when u get out of it u still feel that you're bobbing along the waves, even to the extend of really bobbing up and down after 25 minutes of when u leave the swimming complex - soaked i tell you, totally soaked, surrounded by "happening" waves of cosplayers crowding the field here, there - everywhere!

my first Cosfest too, really. And my first time getting over my fear of "dare not to ask" cosplayers to take their photos. But with Alice-san around, i felt more secure and encouraged to ask - still awkward at first, but in the end i was happily taking pictures until i drifted far

i really enjoyed holding bags for Alice-san, really fun to. And to do the Caramelldansen off-stage while the cosplayers were doing it onstage. It was really cool that the emcee got all cosplayers to get up and do the dance X3 Looking at all of them, i wish i was with them, leading everyone who were downstage to do the dance - and cos i thought Alice-san - no Alice-SAMA X3 went up to dance so the only thing on my mind was, "Aw man, if i was cosplaying i want to Caramelldansen beside SOUBI."

it was at Cosfest that i finally understood why fans cry and screaming their names when seeing Beatles, Elvis Presley and Michael Jackson 'live' - cos i was screaming, calling out for Soubi and tears were almost filling the brim of my eyes when i saw Soubi upstage - so far that's the best Soubi i've ever seen. Upon reflection i guess one of the reasons why fans cry is because of the desperation that they felt far and they WANT to LIVE WITH their "idol"

i had the feeling not to scream for Alice-sama..*giggle* cos much later i realised Alice-sama didn't go upstage

Sigh..two years, is it...i've shrunk a little, thanks to my determination..i have a little more confidence now but i still disobey about eating less than moderate and am paying the price for it..wat, i get hungry very fast leh, that means ah i eat more times than norm if i eat less than moderate leh

already two people say liao i'm always hungry XD

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taking a break

>> Thursday, July 16, 2009

still remember shiroi tenshi's words to take a day's break or two. Really need it.

yesterday i had a big meal, thanks to Marah X3 (meow!) sushi, soft-shelled crab, tempura ebi, salmon sashimi (SLUUUURP! NYANG!) But bcos i took too much soya sauce i suffered for it today: my hands were shaking, my speed has increased too fast that i couldn't control myself - eek.

so i guess i need to slow down today. not bad, cos i need to do some file maintenance - my pc's memory increased again X3

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phobia n deja vu

>> Wednesday, July 15, 2009

i have this phobia of meeting exs..eek, thank goodness i'm still not seen by them, or i haven't bumped into them - i'm so not ready for these encounters! i'm still not tolerant - understatement - of them if they come to me「神様隠まって!!!!」お願い~~~~

one night some friends n i were in one of our friend's car n to my shock, our driver-friend drove past a plain site which was exactly in my dream long time ago! first time i was there too that night! I do have deja vus but rarely

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uta

>> Saturday, July 11, 2009

(sing/song in Japanese)

ganbare nya!

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yaaaay!!!

>> Friday, July 10, 2009

so happy so happy so happy!!!!! the best thing that happened to me this morning n i can smile again!!!

lesson learnt, really

thank u (more than words)

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Natsu Yuuzora

>> Thursday, July 9, 2009

i'm hooked on enka-styled songs since i stumbled upon the song "Haru no Katami" sang by Chitose Hajime which is also the ending for the anime "Ayakashi - Samurai Horror Tales". And to my pleasant surprise the anime Natsume Yuujinchou has also has an enka-styled ending which has become a nice earworm - "Natsu Yuuzora (Summer Evening Sky)" sang by Atari Kousuke.

The image doesn't move after u have clicked the play icon on this YouTube so you can proceed to read English-translated lyrics below it which are taken from a third-party source



The western sky becomes so colorful
as it is pierced by the ray of sunlight
The scent of summer is everywhere
as the afternoon shower stopped

The light of the old memories flooded me
as I tried to picture them clearly in my mind
I could hear voices of my friends emerges slowly

The scent of that summer twilight came
vividly even after all this time
Even now, my heart smiles
when I think back about that summer

The lantern were so colorful
in that summer festival
As I recalled the resounding bell
my heart started to tremble inside

The cicadas are crying noisily
as I walk through the grove alone
I try to recall what those days were like

Even now,
I can recall in my heart
the quiet whispers of everything
that were happening
in those precious days

As a person, we must protect those things
As a person, we must learn from the things
that was created by the past generations
Keep those important lessons in our heart

The scent of that summer twilight came
vividly even after all this time
Spread the warmth
of those unchanging days

Remember that summer

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TIERIA'S IN DA HOUSE - YAHAHAHAHAA!!!!

>> Tuesday, July 7, 2009

still into Shindo Shuichi's of Gravitation "Yahahahaha..!"

no, Tieria in echt (since when? he's just an anime character yahahahaa..!!) but Tieria's colour - purple

yes i hear this - i remembered i tried very hard to control screaming with laughter - "the more confusing the more purple it gets" XD i'll explain..

..it's refreshing to see a bamboo pole wrapped in a different colour amongst the little blue forest of bamboos

love the purple - da

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「羊ガ...」Part II

>> Monday, July 6, 2009

explaining the counting sheep CD

"there's music also when the person (Yuki Kaida) is counting. The Japanese are good at sublimation."

just checked the correct meaning of sublimation - what i meant to say was "subliminal"

after reflection it's hard to explain subliminal..okay, maybe mind shuffle - (Yu Gi O!!!)

あ~~~! も!!!
(aaaargh!!!! = give up explaining)

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「羊ガ...」

ah, finally, finish my studies for the day..

after a stressful 3 hours Miyano Mamoru's counting sheep track suddenly came to my mind as i needed to destress n wind myself down - thanks to my shiroi tenshi

halfway through, i decided to change tracks to Yuki Kaida who does a Fuji Shusuke/Syuusuke, (Prince of Tennis) voice to count sheep..stumbled upon Tezuka's voice actor's first..KYAAA!!! who counted sheep, but the voice actor who took on the role of a - butler? but i decided to trance myself with "Fuji's" voice..and there was a instrumental track that accompanied "him"..really almost slept!

Yuki Kaida "Why..can't sleep? My voice..can't (make you sleep)..?"
moe-ing your favourite voice (actor) to count sheep for you to sleep - think really can sleep meeeeeh?! XD

now "Tezuka's" *giggle*

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it's a little easier

still exploring, still learning to know what i like, what i don't like

my time-table rocks, gives me a chance to do the rest of the things i like X3

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back in its sheath

>> Thursday, July 2, 2009

time allowed me to show Streetfest pics, to friends of mine, different time, different locations, telling them "oh this photo's (this and that)" ..before i could talk about mine - and as far as i can remember - three or four of them pointed to the photograph of myself with the wig and asked, "So this is a male too?"

i've always wanted to do the opposite - proven by people who've never had the experience nor knowledge of cosplaying with an (i'd realised) ambiguous photo shot angle - my dream come true

Louis is next..

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imperfection and confidence

>> Wednesday, July 1, 2009



In a nutshell: the lady with imperfection vents her frustrations. In comes a man also with an imperfection. What he has compliments her and vice-versa, but each must get used to each other's imperfection = perfection

it's actually the dancers' true stories of their own lives. The ballerina learnt since 9 years of age but years later lost an arm in an accident. She rekindled her love for dancing when she taught kids how to dance for their dancing lessons. However she was rejected again n again, taunted by many just because she has one arm, saying that she couldn't make it

She found a partner. The male lost his limb in an accident. He learnt dancing from her just because he had nothing better to do. He gave up 3 times in the process

But she was patient with him. And together they joined China's talent show (the whole of China!) - competing with non-handicapped contestants - and won

know, understand and walk through the imperfection with each other, each other complimenting each other. It doesn't have to be a couple relationship - the same goes with friends - thank you all for tolerating my imperfection and helping me to be perfect in those areas of imperfection..compliments..all of you



everyone has the potential to make it..it's also about confidence..how does one start? Tell yourself, "I'm not as bad as I think I am." Don't shallow yourself as you say that but believe in yourself. Because no one will believes you if you don't believe in yourself - that, to me, is a root to confidence

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Time

inspired by real life events and Bleach characters
Time (click here to read)

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how much do i need..

hours before dawn there was a sound of an avalanche in the storeroom to which a few seconds later i drifted to sleep

this morning i awoke n found a blister on my toe. As i went to the storeroom to get my plaster i remembered the avalanche. i opened the door - and froze

out of nowhere, Monoploy board game had fallen - and a slight mess within - dragging along the bags that were hung next to it, landing onto smaller things like hair mousse, mosquito spray, liquid soap (huge bottle)..all cluttered all over the floor

it was the Monopoly that got me rooted to the floor

まさか...

i fought back insanity, "No, it just fell, there's no connection whatsoever.."

i almost snapped in nervous breakdown because i was screaming within, begging that everything would be alright, one shock yesterday, now this - it cannot be that coincidental..

i stood rooted for a minute, although in my mind was, "pick up, pick up.." it wasn't until i heard a movement that i forced myself to snap out of it

and the sky's dark with thunder..went to the kitchen n brought the clothes back in from the pegholes..i really feel very uncomfortable..although there's a cute doggie (looks cute from my view) sniffing from one bush to another

as i left the kitchen for the hall..just one..

無事だよ...

i'd learnt a lot by de-linking but if the root of the "why" hasn't been solved, i'd never be able to de-link things n move on in my life. So it's amazing that i still am able to hit some Japanese in this wreck state i'm in..i know, i don't sound wrecked just because i'm using my mind to move my fingers on the keyboard at the same time

i wanted to try something n upload on YouTube...but..the Monopoly..i can't..like Muru, somehow i'm "shut up"

but sidetrack: no matter what, learning Japanese is my childhood dream. i'm not going to let anything hinder this dream

and i just got a smaller shock..i was "re-edited" - rather a photo of mine XD if i have such smooth face - aw man i'm so jealous!!!! XD!!!! PROST YA!!!!! XD

AND WHY IN THE WORLD HAD I NOT USED NEUTROGENA PORE REFINING TONER EARLIER?!!! just one nite n - i am LOOKING at the differencE in the mirror !!!!! Highly recommended

oh i just remembered..i've got homework..

right, i'll reply some ema..

i just read two..i froze in shock again and my life..just went to the drain once more..i can't stop cursing n swearing at the pain that i'm taking..had i fucking read my inbox earlier..

anyway..i'll reply emails..*groan* Dai Gor..du..XD!!!!! make my dream come true make my dream come true..weiss..ja ja..farben, farben..verstehe verstehe..

「just one wish
before」 i deny my「self」
kick ass, LOST REASON..KYAAA!!! I CAN NEVER SING LIKE NISHIKAWA TAKANORI!!!!! HE ROCKS!!!! of COURSE i KNOW my voice..

i never knew i've ended up like someone i never want to be

the only thing that's different - my rock roots, the only so-call tangible existence that i'm clinging on..in this wrecked state i'm in i'm not even sure if i can sing this weekend..

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insomnia

as usual

two good news is not enough to crash my depression

i hate the library, it's very noisy now. i've nowhere to study in peace

people say even non bgr relationships have phases: first few months the honeymoon phase = everything's "sweet" and "nice". But once got to know better, that's when u "see" one another = outbursts, misunderstandings, taking one another for granted, "i thought", "you thought", "i should've done this n that..."

thus my insomnia

cos the truth is out, just as i feared

suicide is the best if not for counselling hours later

cos my pillar has crashed

even after counselling i'd still feel heavy - not bcos the counselling won't work, but - kids, don't try this ever - the pain i refuse to let go to punish myself

i don't know what i am now, i feel i'm a fcukin entity to the world now

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lastly..

thank you for reading my blog..

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